The fear, the hatred, the love, and the blessings, all became one when I first time hold her on my arms. For me gunuinely it was more scientific magic than emotional outcome. I lived this more of my past on the first half. Second half I was occupied by my child. The year taught me that we are not above our hormonal changes and physical need. Lack of patience dominant through out the year. It was more of a war with mom, in regards to food on time, talk nice things. I always wanted her to understand my emotional need. And whenever it was not happening I got furious. But time must move on. And when at the end of the day I talked to my child, all my anger got demenishes.
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